I had already start teaching for a couple of months. Sometimes, it can be really tiring and all, and i hate it when i have to raise my voice to bring across instruction whenever the children are extremely noisy. Sometimes i feel my blood boiling to nearing evaporation. I hate it when things get out of control for a while and i have to take control immediately. Such a perfectionist! I mean, with young children around, we need to expect some impefections here and there. But nonetheless, i have to say, i like it so far. I still am full of interest for whatever i'm doing. Sometimes more administrative work to do, sometimes more marking to do. I like planning lessons, and whenever my children show lots of interest in my lesson, there is this sense of happiness within, knowing i had done a very good job. I like teaching, because it require alot of interaction and interaction is definitely my strong point:)
I have to say this job is hard. But then, when you reflect upon it, it really bring alot of joy to you. Everyday facing different challenges. And though the little "devil" can really really make you wanna go mad. But when they decided to turn into angel....i can tell you, it really paint rainbows in your life!
Happy children's day! always a child at heart:)
Today while travelling on MRT, i saw a gal sitting apposite me, wearing AJC uniform and was so engrossed in studying that the rest of the world seems to be non-existent to her. I suddenly thought of myself two years back. I was just like her, wearing AJC uniform, carrying a stack of files into the half-crowded train, and trying to cramp as much facts as possible into my brain, or rushing thru tutorials everyday. How carefree life was back then, with studies as the only concern in life. To think i used to secretly complain to God about endless homework, and not being able to sleep anything more than four hours a day.
Now, i understand, that back then, i was so carefree, with not much responsibilities as compared to now....
Somehow, looking at the gal sitting opposite me just make me a little regretful about life. About not stretching myself to the fullest and really try my best. And looking at her, really make me want to go back to JC life and start all over again. But then, on second thought, i am really more than satisfied with life right now. Doing something i enjoy almost everyday.
I guess in life, we shall not keep looking back and ask the question what if...because no matter how much you hope for another chance to undo whatever you regret doing, it will never happen.
Just live you life to the fullest. And i guess i will, right now, rather be the gal, wearing sports attire everyday, sitting on the train, looking thru lesson plan, occasionally dozing off, occasionally looking at other people sitting opposite of me....
Now, i understand, that back then, i was so carefree, with not much responsibilities as compared to now....
Somehow, looking at the gal sitting opposite me just make me a little regretful about life. About not stretching myself to the fullest and really try my best. And looking at her, really make me want to go back to JC life and start all over again. But then, on second thought, i am really more than satisfied with life right now. Doing something i enjoy almost everyday.
I guess in life, we shall not keep looking back and ask the question what if...because no matter how much you hope for another chance to undo whatever you regret doing, it will never happen.
Just live you life to the fullest. And i guess i will, right now, rather be the gal, wearing sports attire everyday, sitting on the train, looking thru lesson plan, occasionally dozing off, occasionally looking at other people sitting opposite of me....
I am working now, not really, thinking about my lesson plan, and slacking here cos i really dunnoe what to write for my PE lesson plan. i dunnoe what to teach for PE:( frown very hard!Teachinf lower primary is easy, cos as long as the kids get to run, jump and just have fun, they are happy and satisfied. It is the upper primary that is a big challenge. Kids nowaday are so hard to please. In my times, erm....actually not that long ago also, as long as there is a ball...we can chase after the ball, and we are satisfied.haiz....thx God though, cos gymnastics is over and they will be learning rounders for the coming week.
The last term, i believe will just fly past, with PSLE, SA2 and it's just such a short term. And very soon, it will be the long holiday. Oh! just can't wait for that long break, cos there will be ray's b'day and christmas:) and probably i'll be able to go somewhere else to relax.
Not that i hate working, and always look forwar to holiday. Infact, if i do a heart search, i love teaching. As long as i am able to sleep, teaching is no prob at all. Because, how many of you out there get to be who u are even at work? Though now i can't be who i'm totally at work cos i have to conform to my mentor's seriousness, but most of the time, i get to teach my style, tell stupid jokes to my students and laugh out loud with them, discuss about the games on facebook(of cos outside lesson time), and just happy happy everyday. And trust me, when i used to work in office, i always need coffe esp after lunch time, just to make my eyes open. But the children, always so noisy, make me awake thru out...hahaha
Anyway, yesterday i was pondering over an issue, and i realise i'm kidda weird. I mean, people usually get closer with God when they face challenges in life and starts to drift away when life is a bed of roses. But for me, it is the opposite, when life is going downhill, my walk with God will go downhill too, and even praying is so hard not to mention doing QT. i dunnoe, but i guess, i am afraid the more i pray, and if the prayer is not answered, i will be very hopeless and i am just so scared. But now life starts to get better, i start to pick up my walk with God again.....
hmmm......
But anyway, i believe when my life is going downhill and i start hiding from God and even bearing grudges on him, he never give up on me. That is why so many prayed for me and intercede for me, so many pull me up and cheer me on. And there is auntie yee ping who i believe is sent by God:)
I wonder is it another chapter of life? That suddenly, without knowing, i have brave through it all. I guess it has not been totally over, but i guess God has been faithful through it all, turning the page of my life with his mighty hand:)
I realise i'm easily scared:( I really distaste killing and bloodshed, and only live in peace and happiness. Because of the story of rachel joy scott shared by ps tim, i was so interested that i look up on the columbine high sch killing occured more than 10 yrs ago online yesterday night. I was so scared that for the whole night i was hugging my bible to sleep, not daring to switch off the light. It is not that i am scared anyone will threaten my life, it is just that i suddenly was so afraid because the world is so not peaceful and so scary and human being can react so cruelly...
Anyway, i had abit of fun with ray, going bukit chantu and army open house.
And i really thx God for the chance to be happy and smiling from the bottom of my heart again!I am very sure, God never do abandone me. Though it was really very tough to the state of wanting to just give up everything and run away from God. But i guess no matter how far we run, God will find us. I'm still having fear sometimes, but at least i'm able to live the life i shld live:) for this, i'm grateful
I realise i'm easily scared:( I really distaste killing and bloodshed, and only live in peace and happiness. Because of the story of rachel joy scott shared by ps tim, i was so interested that i look up on the columbine high sch killing occured more than 10 yrs ago online yesterday night. I was so scared that for the whole night i was hugging my bible to sleep, not daring to switch off the light. It is not that i am scared anyone will threaten my life, it is just that i suddenly was so afraid because the world is so not peaceful and so scary and human being can react so cruelly...
Anyway, i had abit of fun with ray, going bukit chantu and army open house.
And i really thx God for the chance to be happy and smiling from the bottom of my heart again!I am very sure, God never do abandone me. Though it was really very tough to the state of wanting to just give up everything and run away from God. But i guess no matter how far we run, God will find us. I'm still having fear sometimes, but at least i'm able to live the life i shld live:) for this, i'm grateful
Living a life of fear is not living at all.
Journey to recovery is always hard, but i'll persevere!
I'll live! i'll overcome! i'll be a happy fren, galfren, and God's beloved daughter!
It has been a really tough week for me. Being slacking for more than 2 whole months and just enjoying life off with no responsibily but just the need to recover from haunting anxiety has been grace given by God. Now suddenly, i have to adapt back to the routine life of working, it has really been stressful.
I can't believe i'm such a weakling, unable to deal with these negative thoughts when insomnia strike real bad. Why can't i just relax my nerve and trust God in moment like this? It's not really such hardship, since i graduated from anderson jc, surely i can take stress and some sleepless nights. But i feel i'm falling apart and all of a sudden i just cannot deal with myself, and then it is follow by the horrid nerves breakdown. So much tears and so many cries to God, prayers that seems to be avoided by the most high up. So helpless and it seems like noone understand what you are going through. All you know is you are going mad, and that tears just can't stop. No laxoten for me, cos i'm really gonna fight it with God's strength. God, please don't abandone me.
Teaching is always my joy, being able to be myself at work. I am really grateful to know that many of my students have miss me badly while i disappear to rest. Comments like you are my favourite teacher really cheer me on especially in times when i just can't fight what is breaking me.Being able to once again listen to what the young souls have to say, and what is making them really upset makes me realise my life has a very big purpose. The jokes we share and the seriousness in work, scolding them and disciplining them, i really just want to see them grow, a little, i'm satisfied.
Surely alot of students are shocked that i have change from teaching english medium subjects to chinese language. I am shocked too! it's just that my chinese is definitely not strong enough. But i am willing to just give everything i have and know. It's really not about the subject you teach, but the students you teach.That's what convicted me to take up any subjects.
In this tough period, i'm grateful to many. Especially boyfren Raymund, who has been praying for me. Who never neglect me. Who keep his handphone by his side even when he is sleeping so that i can call whenever i'm upset. Who, because of me had shed alot of tears and lose alot of sleep. Who, came all the way from camp just to tell me he is always there. Who is always trying to control his tears and force out a smile just to let me know everything will be fine.Because of this, i have come to realise how much love i've been given. And my mum had even tell me to count myself really fortunate to have such wonderful boyfren who is basically extinct already.Because of this and the many frens who has been so concern for me, and Go'd love for me, i'll fight this battle!
I'll be a good teachers. And i just want to scream out loud! I love to teach!
This week has been really great. Firstly, i finally packed my room. I had been hating the mess in my wardrobe for very long, somehow managed to ignored it for weeks. I finally took that big step and packed it. Now finally i feel liberated from:) hee.....
Secondly, i finally went all the way to payar lebar to make my NIE card. Though it was raining heavily and i had a terrible stomachache on the way and the queue was so long. But i still got it done eventually.
Thirdly, i had been so proud of myself for cooking my own meal last sunday, of cos along with equally cooking-idiot, Eliza. I think the vegetable i fried was kind of delicious:) and noone suffer from any major food-poisoning thereafter. And somehow i feel i'm ready to get married, apart from not having that $600000.
Forthly, i went jogging all by myself and i jogged 8 rounds without stopping, and i feel so fit and young, and it was so great to be able to brag about it.
Then i watched ice-age 3 with ray, sulwyn and leow:) and it's my first time watching a 3-d show in cinema. And i think it's a great show and the graphic is so clear. But i lost my belt in the cinema:(
I Love God for loving me that i have a lovely week
If i can run after the rainbow....
If i can just run after the rainbow.....
the colourful rainbow,
its beauty beyond description....
i'll run after the rainbow,
with tears in my eyes,
tears of joy, of happiness,
knowing....in my heart.....
that there will always be a rainbow for me to run after....
God....you say this rainbow i'm running after is a promise between earth and heaven....
will you give me a rainbow everytime after a heavy storm?
so i can run, run,run.....after you.....
i so need a rainbow to run after....
b'cos God you no longer seems near...
my life has turn dark,
no colour.....no you.....
if i can run after a rainbow......
if i can just run after the rainbow.....
i'll know you are still there......
your promise, your everlasting love.....
If i can just run after the rainbow.....
the colourful rainbow,
its beauty beyond description....
i'll run after the rainbow,
with tears in my eyes,
tears of joy, of happiness,
knowing....in my heart.....
that there will always be a rainbow for me to run after....
God....you say this rainbow i'm running after is a promise between earth and heaven....
will you give me a rainbow everytime after a heavy storm?
so i can run, run,run.....after you.....
i so need a rainbow to run after....
b'cos God you no longer seems near...
my life has turn dark,
no colour.....no you.....
if i can run after a rainbow......
if i can just run after the rainbow.....
i'll know you are still there......
your promise, your everlasting love.....
It has been so long since i last wrote something here. Mainly b'cos i really have nothing to write about and really don't just feel like writing something for the sake of writing. You realise the older u grow, the less word exit from your mouth and the list of totes will sort of get shorter inside your brain. It seems like an invisible hand has been turning the pages of my life, from teenagehood to womanhood, without myself knowing.
Life has been kind of monotonous, but having a boring life is quite a blessing for me. Being able to just rest and sleep and have nothing very important to think about is really very good. Very soon, responsibilities will start streaming in again, in the meantime, i'll just shut everything off and REST!
I had been to Korea since i last disappear from my livejournal. Oh well, it's not a very significant trip, so i shall not elaborate on it. Basically i like the weather there. It is mainly sightseeing and not much shopping, hence the souvenior i bought back is kidda pathetic.
For the rest of my life, i have kind of forgotten about:( sadly speaking, life is just like that, nothing important worth remembering. I can blog about what i did, but noone will be very interested. and so i'll and shall just end here....oh! Sulwyn and Joanne dragged me to pluck my eyebrow. I tote it'll be very pain and i will shrieked and cry. But in the end it's so bearable and the result let you know everything is worth it! thx jo and sul. If i am prettier, all glory go to your and of cos God for giving me that potential to be prettier...wahahahahaha!!!!!!!
In the end, i blog for the sake of blogging...lol
Life has been kind of monotonous, but having a boring life is quite a blessing for me. Being able to just rest and sleep and have nothing very important to think about is really very good. Very soon, responsibilities will start streaming in again, in the meantime, i'll just shut everything off and REST!
I had been to Korea since i last disappear from my livejournal. Oh well, it's not a very significant trip, so i shall not elaborate on it. Basically i like the weather there. It is mainly sightseeing and not much shopping, hence the souvenior i bought back is kidda pathetic.
For the rest of my life, i have kind of forgotten about:( sadly speaking, life is just like that, nothing important worth remembering. I can blog about what i did, but noone will be very interested. and so i'll and shall just end here....oh! Sulwyn and Joanne dragged me to pluck my eyebrow. I tote it'll be very pain and i will shrieked and cry. But in the end it's so bearable and the result let you know everything is worth it! thx jo and sul. If i am prettier, all glory go to your and of cos God for giving me that potential to be prettier...wahahahahaha!!!!!!!
In the end, i blog for the sake of blogging...lol
i've been learning very hard to fight it! i guess so far i've been winning the battle. God, i trust u! i trust u in winning the battles for me!
it has been so hard. The struggles are just so unbearable. But for those who love me, i'll not give up. Just want the patience from all of u, to understand sometimes i might not be able to deal with my emotions, especially my anxiety properly!
nonetheless, life has been colourful. My temporary job before sch starts is just great so far. it's monotonus tho, but i feel happy being able to do something whole day long. i guess i'm kind of a born workaholics. i love the feeling of working hard and then returning home to a table of good home cook food. i told a collegues today that i can't wait to go home, cos i can't wait to start eating my dinner. and she started laughing at me. hmm...but still home and food motivate me to live everyday happily! haha.....
oh...i got what i want:) i'll be a teacher for sure. thats great.
i guess being in love with someone who love u back is really great. but somehow its just so hard. of cos i'm not talking about the relationship being hard. but more of waiting and waiting...the fact that there is army. every 5 days of waiting earns u 1.5 days of happiness and u go back to 5 days of waiting again:( and that 1.5 days it seems u always have to worry about lots and lots of matters. like what if he spent too little time with his friends and family, but somehow u want him to spend more time with u. haiz....all the struggle and confusion...but for love its worth it:)
God love you and me!!!!!
I have been learning alot lately. About life, and about myself, to be specific. Been spending alone time while my parents were away travelling the globe. Sometimes you feel this sense of loneliness dwelling upon you. you starts to worry alot, and there is this emptiness within you, grasping so tightly on you. i get breathless at that strong grip and suddenly, panic strike me and i don't know what to do.....
Somehow we human beings tend to forget God during the most critical moment....that He, the sovereign Lord, tells us not to worry. But still i worry alot:( What if God has no plan for me? as if! Sometimes i'll tote about the option of packing up my luggage and going far far away. But there is just too much to put down over here. I will never ever want to leave!
You know, i have never experience serious loneliness in life. i'm never a reject in sch, never the one without any friends. My life has always been filled with up and down, and lots of excitement. But its due to this far-fetched life, that loneliness tend to crept into me especially when life suddenly seems so quiet and peaceful....
Today, i learnt the importance of seeking God in solitude. Quietness is not neccesarily a bad thing. I guess it's just something i need to learn to cultivate within me. God has a really beautiful plan for me....
I've learn to love myself more because God so love me and because i know you so love me. I shall not dwell in unhappiness, wasting off my time crying quietly becuse i have hours and days to go before a few hours of happiness that end so soon always....look at life in this other angle. Wait patiently for the Lor dand in the meanwhile, i'll just take deep breath and live a happy girl.....
oh...i'm going Korea in April!
oh...and its gonna be a long wait again...trusting God again....but i'll always remember your strong arm on my shoulder, telling me....you are always here for me...even if i'm a lousy failure and seems to get lost in my life...and seems to have no future.....
five days to go....many hours with God....friends keep me strong....i'm just a simple girl...yearning to know!
Somehow we human beings tend to forget God during the most critical moment....that He, the sovereign Lord, tells us not to worry. But still i worry alot:( What if God has no plan for me? as if! Sometimes i'll tote about the option of packing up my luggage and going far far away. But there is just too much to put down over here. I will never ever want to leave!
You know, i have never experience serious loneliness in life. i'm never a reject in sch, never the one without any friends. My life has always been filled with up and down, and lots of excitement. But its due to this far-fetched life, that loneliness tend to crept into me especially when life suddenly seems so quiet and peaceful....
Today, i learnt the importance of seeking God in solitude. Quietness is not neccesarily a bad thing. I guess it's just something i need to learn to cultivate within me. God has a really beautiful plan for me....
I've learn to love myself more because God so love me and because i know you so love me. I shall not dwell in unhappiness, wasting off my time crying quietly becuse i have hours and days to go before a few hours of happiness that end so soon always....look at life in this other angle. Wait patiently for the Lor dand in the meanwhile, i'll just take deep breath and live a happy girl.....
oh...i'm going Korea in April!
oh...and its gonna be a long wait again...trusting God again....but i'll always remember your strong arm on my shoulder, telling me....you are always here for me...even if i'm a lousy failure and seems to get lost in my life...and seems to have no future.....
five days to go....many hours with God....friends keep me strong....i'm just a simple girl...yearning to know!
AHHHHH!!!! it's a MAD generation! Everyday you wake up, hoping that Mr Obama found a solution to recession, but only to know that recession is heading to the worst! The package don't seem to be working out cos pple still get retrenched all over the world! see! How many billionaire commited suicide? Crazy world!
Today i wanted to have my lunch in pastamania, but think otherwise. I know i'm not, even the least badly hit by this scary financial storm, but still.....don't you feel guilty to enjoy such a luxury life in such moment? Hey! not stingy k? i guess this kidda food will be best enjoyed and most worth it when i eat with a group of friends:)
To think my parents pack their luggages like nobody's business...taking the airplane more than i take the taxi....tonight heading off to Thailand, the next month to HK, then to China and planning a trip to korea in april.....and leaving me poor gal suffering in this lonely house ALL BY MYSELF!!!!
last week whilst they happily enjoy themselves in somewhere not singapore again....how many pple lose their jobs? and poor me got insomnia for getting abit too depress and lonely:(
oh....stop whining like a baby! YOU ARE OLD ENOUGH TO BAHAVE LIKE AN ADULT! but still i guess i give them my blessing to enjoy their life esp when they had work so hard and it seems the world is going bersak and there is nothing we can do BUT to live life to the maximun!
OH!!! There is this naughty boy in sch who is really handsome(ok...8yrs younger than me and happen to be my student, so don't go thinking i'm a flirt, a cheat), and extremely clever...but....i just don't understand why is he self-destroying himself? Getting into all sort of troubles, ending up in the discipline master's room almost everyday and home bound and can't see his peers. The worst is he get so sadist to the state of killing fishes in the eco-garden. It seems that seeing the fish strggle to death is his enjoyment. AHHHHHHH! i don't underst you at all....but there is this part within me that want to be a teacher-cum-friend to you. life must be terribly hard to cause you to be who you are now. I hope 10 years down the road, i will read somewhere in newspaper that you are a very sucessful young man( i so believe you can cos you are so extremely clever) instead of seeing somewhere in the newspaper that you are sent to jail due to your sadist character.....
oh....a few more hours...a few more hours....i hope you are surviving well......
I'm thinking of wat title i shld give to this post. Choosing among"i hit 2", "happy b'day gal"....but in the end i decided on this title:)
I really feel so blessed today. Who can be as God bless as me to have a mother who planned my whole b'day. A boyfren-to-be who spend all the effort to make it work. 2 sisters cum bestfren forever who neglect their studies to be there!And a so-called-dadddy to foot the bill:)
I was so upset this morning. Tote my b'day is forgotten by my parents again.....no matter how raymund spent that effort, there was this bit of sadness within....
But...they surprised me!!! it's a small surprise, but a well-planned one! oh...my mum is such a liar!!!haha...think i took over the gene!
it's so great to be led to cck by raymund into a car with everyone i so loved....well...bro in brunei...can't be helped!!!
somehow its not so much abt the presents...but its how God sent these pple into my life...whom i know will be dere for me forever....and ever....
:)happy b'day weetheng!!!!
I dislike myself for disliking you!!!!
I am horribly horrible. Yes i know! I dislike you, dislike you, dislike you!
I'm a christian, yes i know! I know, i know,i know! I must love the whole world!
But....i seek but to no avail....
and so.....
I dislike myself for disliking you!
I am horribly horrible. Yes i know! I dislike you, dislike you, dislike you!
I'm a christian, yes i know! I know, i know,i know! I must love the whole world!
But....i seek but to no avail....
and so.....
I dislike myself for disliking you!
As the deer panteth for the water, so my soul long after thee. You alone are my hearts desire and i long to worship thee....
this song reflected my year 2008. Always thirsting after God just like how a deer thirst after water...
Now, stepping into year 2009, i believe it's a hard year. First there is the really bad recession! tho i'm not affected by it, but i kind of feel so anxious for the world! Then Isreal going into war with Iraq, and you wonder is world war 3 is coming:( The worst is hetting the two this year and making me feel so old:( oops! just kidding!
Every year i'll come out with new year resolutions. And it's always the same old stuff...i want to improve temper, i want to love God more, i want to do QT more regularly......
This year's resolution kind of change....cos i'm hitting two u c....hee.....
not going to discuss my resolution openly here......
oh...but it's gonna be an exciting year....learning to find my purpose, God's will and working hard for future............happy new year!!!!
When i was a kid, i always anticipate the arrival of christmas. We will go to uncle's house for celebration. Lots of food and lots of presents from the adults. My favourite part was the exchange of presents with all my cousins. There was one particular year when i got a box of colour pencil in gifts exchange. I was so happy....sounds so childish....but i guess i must be real happy inorder to remember such event all the way till today:)
When i had outgrown all these and my family stops meeting up for christmas celebration due to the death of ah ma, christmas got abit dull. I can't be excite by presents so easily, probably cos i can afford alot of things since i am older now. Food? i guess i am feasting thru out the years. Even the lightings in orchard road seems kind of dull. And there was one particular year, i really hate christmas. Daddy promised to bring us to orchard road to c the man made snow. I was looking forward to it so much. But in the end.....daddy din keep his promises. To make up for it, mummy brought us to watch it instead. I was so sad, i cried.....i guess i should be happy cos i got to watch the snow eventually, but it just wasn't the same without daddy......
Is christmas all abt having fun. stuffing myself with log cake, ham and turkey, getting presents and singing christmas songs?
Yesterday, i went to pcf christmas party, and i was reminded that when jesus arrived on earth, it was a silent night. But it was a night filled with joy...joy that overflow from within. Pastor Shern said happiness comes from things that satisfy us. In other word, we need to seek for happiness. But joy comes from within....as i watched the short clip abt jesus's walk to the cross, how men whipped him, nailed him....and sand the song beautiful saviour...suddenly i realise.....christmas is all abt jesus. How every year, i'll tell my fellow frenz to always remember that christmas is all abt jesus. But how i never fail to seek for earthly fulfillment during christmas. I guess....i had forgotten the real meaning, the real joy of christmas for many years.....
This christmas is not the same. The first year i made cards for frenz in church...the first year i found God in a silent night.....and God gave me a big present this year.....a present that made me feel so joyful....joy dat overflow from within.....
Thx you ray for being so brave on a very silent night, making me a very happy gal.....Thx you jesus for loving me so much to come on earth into a dirty manger on a very silent night, so that my sins can be forgiven.
When i had outgrown all these and my family stops meeting up for christmas celebration due to the death of ah ma, christmas got abit dull. I can't be excite by presents so easily, probably cos i can afford alot of things since i am older now. Food? i guess i am feasting thru out the years. Even the lightings in orchard road seems kind of dull. And there was one particular year, i really hate christmas. Daddy promised to bring us to orchard road to c the man made snow. I was looking forward to it so much. But in the end.....daddy din keep his promises. To make up for it, mummy brought us to watch it instead. I was so sad, i cried.....i guess i should be happy cos i got to watch the snow eventually, but it just wasn't the same without daddy......
Is christmas all abt having fun. stuffing myself with log cake, ham and turkey, getting presents and singing christmas songs?
Yesterday, i went to pcf christmas party, and i was reminded that when jesus arrived on earth, it was a silent night. But it was a night filled with joy...joy that overflow from within. Pastor Shern said happiness comes from things that satisfy us. In other word, we need to seek for happiness. But joy comes from within....as i watched the short clip abt jesus's walk to the cross, how men whipped him, nailed him....and sand the song beautiful saviour...suddenly i realise.....christmas is all abt jesus. How every year, i'll tell my fellow frenz to always remember that christmas is all abt jesus. But how i never fail to seek for earthly fulfillment during christmas. I guess....i had forgotten the real meaning, the real joy of christmas for many years.....
This christmas is not the same. The first year i made cards for frenz in church...the first year i found God in a silent night.....and God gave me a big present this year.....a present that made me feel so joyful....joy dat overflow from within.....
Thx you ray for being so brave on a very silent night, making me a very happy gal.....Thx you jesus for loving me so much to come on earth into a dirty manger on a very silent night, so that my sins can be forgiven.
Life had been really exciting.I guess i'll just leave a smiley face here and let it speak everything:)
Am reading chicken soup for the sister souls and every little storey in dere despict the love and joy of sishood. Some stories even made me teared abit....thinking abt my own sishood....can't help but give a sigh....not a heavy sigh...but a sigh of happiness.....
In life, frenz come and go....but there is a sister who has been lingering in my life for nearly 7 years....
It seems God had long ago planned this frenship, bonding us tgt in his kingdom....we study tgt, play tgt, most importantly, we grow, taller and over the year, fatter(sadly) but also in our walk with God....looking back now, how i'll shake my head at all the mischievous times we had, skipping service because the sermon don't seems to click, doing all the really nonsensical stuff, and just being young and youthful....times whereby we wantedt o just scream at each other, erm...i guess i contribute mostly to the screaming...hee....but we always end up apologising...and no matter how much hurts we inflicted, it always seems to be wiped away and able to start afresh. The most imp thing abt a frenship is to forgive and forget....
How time flies. We are now stepping into young adult hood....slowly our life is parting and more frens step into our lives....we no longer share so much similarities in all the path we choose...but i always feel good to know that there will always be a bestfren, a great sis who is just a phone call away to share all my joy,my sorrow.....
No matter how old we grow, i believe with God, our frenship will never die....lets be youthful forever:)
eliza....thx for everything.....we will be frenz forever!!!!!
Am reading chicken soup for the sister souls and every little storey in dere despict the love and joy of sishood. Some stories even made me teared abit....thinking abt my own sishood....can't help but give a sigh....not a heavy sigh...but a sigh of happiness.....
In life, frenz come and go....but there is a sister who has been lingering in my life for nearly 7 years....
It seems God had long ago planned this frenship, bonding us tgt in his kingdom....we study tgt, play tgt, most importantly, we grow, taller and over the year, fatter(sadly) but also in our walk with God....looking back now, how i'll shake my head at all the mischievous times we had, skipping service because the sermon don't seems to click, doing all the really nonsensical stuff, and just being young and youthful....times whereby we wantedt o just scream at each other, erm...i guess i contribute mostly to the screaming...hee....but we always end up apologising...and no matter how much hurts we inflicted, it always seems to be wiped away and able to start afresh. The most imp thing abt a frenship is to forgive and forget....
How time flies. We are now stepping into young adult hood....slowly our life is parting and more frens step into our lives....we no longer share so much similarities in all the path we choose...but i always feel good to know that there will always be a bestfren, a great sis who is just a phone call away to share all my joy,my sorrow.....
No matter how old we grow, i believe with God, our frenship will never die....lets be youthful forever:)
eliza....thx for everything.....we will be frenz forever!!!!!
Political correct ans, i'll choose God!!!
The most anticipated youth camp is finally over. This mark my last lap as a youth, and my journey into young adulthood! i guess many are feeling really excited over the new journey ahead, but i dunnoe y am i grieving. A large part of me is being left behind....yet i know....for sure.....God want me to advance on in life.
Camp was really great! Not that i want to praise valery and myself, but i guess the programs we planned are super fun...hee. Much thx to the camp com for all the great help and of cos God and holy spirit for giving us the unlimited wisdom for the planning process:)
Tho something unpleasant cropped out along the way, but in the end, everything are solved beautifully. Thx God for providing good weather all the way thru camp, and for those who calm me down when i got really pissed when agitated or put under too much stress(as usual). The highlight of the camp-underground church, went well. I was so scared it will screwed up or turn into a terrible joke of the yr. But it all went well, motive achieved and noone seriously traumatised! Oh! but i guess i feel really terrible after the whole thing, and i can't help but sob like a baby!!! It was terrible to "torture" ur own sis and bro in christ, to c them cry and so helpless.....But it was really touching to c them, shoulder to shoulder, pray and worship God, shouting out loud their faith and never give up....i guess i learnt so much in this underground church too....
Anw....as usual...i don't get any hangover....bvut i know deep now i'll get it right smack on me sooner or later. It seems my heart and my brain always slowed in such process...hee....
Shifted back home. Home sweet home. New environment.....kind of miss cousin....but i guess.....i still prefer home.....
oh, my poor eyes! okie....weetheng! stop whining! BUT...oh! my poor eyes....hump!!!!!!
I'm so looking forward to eating popye, and dis time round leow is driving us to changi airport to eat popye. That mean i nid not travel the long journey, dat mean i will(should) enjoy my popye more.....BUT....i can only eat mash potato now!!!! stupid stupid eyes!!!!
i think wat i really nid to do now....is to shut down my computer and stop straining my dear eyes!
oh...honestly...i'm just worried that my swell will not go away on thurs.....
I'm so looking forward to eating popye, and dis time round leow is driving us to changi airport to eat popye. That mean i nid not travel the long journey, dat mean i will(should) enjoy my popye more.....BUT....i can only eat mash potato now!!!! stupid stupid eyes!!!!
i think wat i really nid to do now....is to shut down my computer and stop straining my dear eyes!
oh...honestly...i'm just worried that my swell will not go away on thurs.....
My eyes are swollen, i have pimples outbreak, slight sprain on my ankle BUT hey! i'm still alive....hee
Life has not been a bed of rose, oh! i don't wanna go on and on on my love for roses again...haha
last week mark the last day of sch and don't wry, i will still be ms Tan when sch reopen.*grin* till the day i go back to be the mischivious naughty student again! hee....
camp is nearing the corner and so, kind of panic since it's my first camp in WEFC and i volunteer myself in planning it. Oh! how exciting!
anw.... pls pray for my eyes, don't let it swell more till i must go cut it and let caleb luff all he want! hump!actually, i'm kind of scared.....scared that i'll be blind....oh! i think too much as usual...but i can't help it!
thus is coming.....counting down......lets just pray that i don't fall down...haha.....
Profile
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif)
tanweetheng- littleBIGgirl
Syndicate
